Success – the elusive element.
I know we need to measure success in small increments, less we get frustrated by the overall picture. However, there are times when you reflect back and realize that you really haven’t traveled that far from the starting line.
I was looking through an old journal from about 6 years ago, and much to my dismay I am still running around in circles with the same life goals AND the same issues.
The two major issues in my life? My weight and my career. You see, 6-8 years ago was the dreaded time that my weight bumped up over the 200 pound marker. And it has been stuck there, fluctuating up and down between 17 pounds, and yet never back under 200 hundred pounds. I don’t know about you, but 200 pounds seriously messes with my brain, being a woman who stands at only 5’7”.
My career issue, well, let’s just say that over the years I have begun many stories and even a series of novels all of which remain unfinished and unseen by anyone. Ultimately I would like to publish my books and become a writer, officially.
On both aspects of my life, I realize that FEAR is what is holding me back. The fear of change and, ridiculously, the fear of success.
I was doing great with FitWorks, getting into the gym 3 days a week consistently and working on my diet. It was a structured commitment, and I wasn’t doing it alone, so “success” was easier to obtain because I always had someone challenging me. It was fun. Then, as it always does, life has gotten in the way. My children have dominated my schedule, I got a couple of odd jobs to juggle around, and once again there is no time for me. No time for me to work out, and no time for me to write, so I get frustrated and angry at my life. My world starts to lose its flow and I fall into that negative space.
So I pulled out some of my old self help books and decided to start working on the exercises available to me. I’ve started with figuring out my Life Plan. The purpose of a life plan is to figure out your ultimate, long term, reaching for the stars goals. I first began with writing my long term goals, and for me, I have a lot of very large, yet in my mind, very doable long term goals. Then I proceeded to break down my list. What can I do within the next year to work toward my ultimate goals? Then I broke it down further to see what I can accomplish over the next month, the next week, and finally, what can I do today to take me one step further toward accomplishment. Sounds simple, right?
Well, I find it rather interesting that I could break it all the way down to what I can do over the next month, but when it came to breaking it down further to a week and then to a day I hit a road block.
There was that fear again, rearing its ugly head. You see the issue is, when you break it down that far, you reveal the real meat of the issue, and you can see the changes that need to be made. All of a sudden, I have to commit to change. I have to actually do it!
What does that mean? I have to make myself the priority and to get MY things done first before I cater to anyone else. Herein lies the problem. I’m a mom, a giver, and a healer. It’s so much easier to solve everyone else’s problems and to put mine aside.
I’ve been doing this for years and because of it, I never make that ultimate commitment to change or to take that pertinent step forward. I hide behind my excuses allowing myself to never have to go through the pain and challenges of creating new lasting habits, breaking old deep set ones that have become such a normal part of my life. It is easy and predictable to stay in my comfort zone (although, how comfortable am I really when I am embarrassed to be seen in public?) because I know what to expect. I know that outcome of my actions of over eating, and not working out.
I am sharing this, because I know that I am not alone. Also, it makes me realize just how much I NEED accountability in my life, so I can’t wait for the next FitWorks trial to begin. I feel very lucky and privileged to have so many trainers and programs here at the Works, just waiting for me to take advantage of them (I just need to take that step to schedule the time in).
I am also very lucky to have such a following of readers. People have approached me to thank me for “putting it out there” and sharing my real life experiences. I feel like a celebrity now when people ask me if I am “The Blogger.” It’s so good to know that I’m reaching some of you who may be suffering from the same issues, or perhaps who may need a little insight as to what your loved ones might be going through.
I’d like to suggest that you also write up a life plan, then, more importantly, schedule in your time to make those important changes in your life. Don’t let fear trap you, and if you need accountability to reach your goals, find a mentor. Be it a success coach, a trainer at the gym, or a friend who has already succeeded in what you wish to accomplish. Don’t be afraid to ask for help, because fear will only leave you trapped, and there are so many super friendly people out there just waiting to help.
Who knows, perhaps creating a life plan will get you excited about pursuing something amazing that you never thought you could accomplish before. Dream big my friends, and as always, thank you for reading. Wishing you all the best!